Nothing.

I don't know why I even bother writing on this stupid thing since nobody ever reads it, even though I've given the address out to many people. Whatever. I'm running in circles. Circles, circles, circles. I can feel myself breaking down. My drive is being dismantled one crucial piece at a time. I went to the wrap party Saturday night for this web series I stared in and I left depressed. That should have been a fantastic night and I left depressed. What the hell is that about? Evrything seems so pointless. It feels like the older I get, the further I move away from everything that matters. The funny thing is I can't even figure out what mattters anymore. I'm beginning to think nothing. Nothing matters. Life is just a cosmic joke that you're forced to live through until you die and then it's the big, fat nothing for you my friend. Doesn't that sound fantastic? Nothing followed by nothing. Maybe Buddha had it right all along. Just find nothing now and then you'll have peace because you'll never be disappointed. I want to curl up and forget the world. Right now that is truely what I want. The struggle is becoming a burden that I no longer wish to carry.