To be or not to be?

That is the question… I have perused those words across the landscape of my mind for decades now and yet, I feel that I have not, even now, cracked the core of their enigma. I am here so therefore I am, but I still don’t feel that… I am. The world moves around me in its machinations and I feel ethereal before it, like a skim of gossamer that can not quite catch the light. Yet, every once in a great while a breeze will shift that skim of gossamer in just the right way so that, for one eternally brief moment, it catches the light and… …oh… the beauty of it stops my heart… I can’t bear to breathe that it might shift that skim of gossamer out of the light… …it is gone. The world grows dull and I am once again translucent. I am tired and I wish to sleep. Oh how I wish to sleep, but I stay awake; waiting… waiting… for that gossamer to shift just the right way one more time… just one more time then I can sleep… I will endure another book of days to feel that beauty one more time… and one more time… and one more time… until the end of my days… I choose to be.

Hidden Beauty

Deep within the eyes
of a girl I know,

I see a smoldering
rooted within hidden

forges; begging, wanting and
yearning, longing, hungering,

needing, lusting, desiring,
fighting, requiring, being,

creating raging holocausts that
burn; passionate upon the altar

of Beauty, lasting into the night;
guiding the lost to her eternal

brilliance, so that they might see that which they
never knew they missed; something unknown; lost; found;

Oh Beauty, spread your wings and take flight upon
the breath of Creation and bring your light down

amongst the lost and weary so that they too might
become that which moves the spirit to greater heights;

a wildfire, spreading outward, engulfing a
world lost in its own blind ignorance, waiting

for the spark that will ignite a smoldering Renaissance
that lies waiting deep within the eyes of a girl I know.